In a conversation yesterday someone told me that I was sowing confusion by using “she” when talking about Caitlyn Jenner. I’m gonna be honest and say that I hate talking about this subject at this point and it’s not even been a week since the Vanity Fair cover was made public. I figured that I should write a few bullets points just to clear up any “confusion” that I may have sown.
1. Bruce Jenner becoming Caitlyn Jenner does not biologicly change the fact that she is a man. There is still that Y chromosome that no amount of hair extensions, hormones or surgeries can do anything about. I know this objectively. But just in the same way that nothing is going to change that fact, nothing that I say is going to change what Caitlyn Jenner does, so I choose to go with respect and call her what she wants to be called.
2. Maybe it is because I speak Spanish that the pronoun doesn’t confuse me at all. We speak in the feminine and masculine. So the word “camisa” is feminine but a shirt is not a woman.
3. I can use “Caitlyn” even though her mother named her “Bruce” the same way that I call Pope Francis “Francis” and not Jorge. And there are those who don’t like Papa and insist on calling him Jorge to be snarky and rude. Because it is rude to not call someone by what they want to be called.
4. I read in a few blog posts that Caitlyn Jenner is only adding to the idea that in order to be a woman you have to look a certain way which is impossible for everyday women to look because we don’t have stylists, money, plastic surgeons, etc. I think that is a great point. We have been fighting the “cover girl” expectations of what women should look like in order to be “beautiful” only to have this Vanity Fair cover cement in those expectations, which are unrealistic. I am not really sure how I feel about that other than it seems to make sense to me, but I will discuss with my drag queen friends and see what happens. Because it is true that being a woman is more than wearing dresses, fixing your hair and make-up.
5. I love Katrina’s post on this which has links to a lot of other posts on it that come from all different angles of looking at it. I find myself agreeing with a lot of them, like Tom McDonald’s, even if I disagree with them on not calling someone what they want to be called. (Apparently, that is where I am “confused”). Simcha’s post is great too.
6. Listen, we live in this world and we have to figure out how to live in it and not be of it. There is a difference. I can know objective truth and not beat people over the head with it. That does nothing to help anyone. But if that’s your thing, then go for it, but it’s not mine. I stand up when I need to and I am kind when I need to and I fight when I need to. The problem that I’m seeing is that everyone is cool when I’m fighting in agreement with the way they think that I should fight and for the things they think that I should fight for but not cool with it when I disagree with them. Story of my life.
I hope that clears up any confusion that anyone may have. This isn’t going away. Jenner is the first of many. This issue isn’t going to just disappear and the media isn’t going to let it go and everything is going to keep getting polarized until there are two camps fighting each other to the death. It’s sad to me because really Catholics shouldn’t be confused about treating people with kindness and respect, but apparently that is only reserved for people who agree with you and live according to your standards in some circles, I don’t see where Jesus said that, but maybe I missed it.