More Thoughts on PR Culture, How Your Support Helps and the Link to my Interview on The Catholic Feminist Podcast

Hello ya’ll! Hope everyone is doing well.

I was recently a guest on the Catholic Feminist Podcast which you can listen to at this link. I am really proud of this interview because I was able to be myself and that made me feel at home. Also, with my husband gone, I rarely get a chance to talk to another adult in real life and I love love love talking.

One of the things that I talked about was the need for more diverse stories in the Catholic world. I also do not think this is a problem with just the Catholic world either. As a pro-life (when it comes to the border and abortion equally), Hispanic, Catholic woman who grew up in poverty and with a past of sleeping around that I talk about openly and do not blame the devil for because I understand how the trauma of sexual abuse as a child works now, it is rare that I find myself in a group of people who I can be totally myself with. The secular world wants stories from women of color UNLESS you are devoutly Catholic and pro-life, the Catholic world wants Hispanic voices who are pro-life but only if you do so walking the Republican definition of what being pro-life. In all situations you are out if you do not fit a narrative being pushed by whoever it is that is “looking for voices”. It is usually with the stipulation that you say the “right things” according to whoever is pushing whatever narrative.

I do not think that I am a victim though because God will always find a way and as I said to Claire on her podcast, people are thirsting for authentic stories and with the internet, I can get my voice out there for people to hear.

But there are things that people can do to help support the writing and speaking of people who have different stories. I say this because of how many messages and comments I have gotten from people after listening to the podcast.

First of all, share the writing of people you like. Share their social media content because honestly, writers nowadays are expected to have a platform in place to be published. Social media content takes time and energy to create and that takes time and energy away from writing so please share it.

Send cash. I do not know a writer who would not benefit from donations. Even those who are making steady money writing and speaking. There is always something that needs to be paid for that would help the writer focus on writing. Even if it a gift certificate for housecleaning, pizza delivery or an Amazon gift card. Or PayPal for the light bill. Every single thing helps because if you are not worrying about how to pay for groceries, you can write.

Patreon. If you know of someone whose writing you love and you have the means to support them through Patreon, do so. That goes with the above suggestion but steady money is always a blessing in this business when steady money is so iffy. I really suck at Patreon but my Patrons inspire me to keep writing on the days when I want to throw in the towel and go back to waiting tables.

Hire them for speaking engagements. If you are not sure how this works, just suggest people who you like to your pastor and see what happens. If you find this does not work then contact that speaker and see if they are willing to speak in your living room. Just FYI, I am. I feel so strongly about people hearing my story both of my conversion and Anthony’s suicide that I will anywhere to tell it. I will work with anyone’s budget.

Send encouraging emails and messages. There is no end to the negative emails, messages and DMs. There is no end to the frustration of being in Catholic media for a number of different reasons. But the struggle is so real. The self doubt is real. The feeling that you are not important is real. It is also spiritual warfare and that ish is SO REAL. Every single encouraging email, message and DM helps fight against those things. I am thankful for every single encouraging message that I get.

Send coffee, coffee giftcards or liquor. I have had someone send me a box of wine and that got me through 2017 to be honest. Always ask the writer you are supporting if alcohol is ok but almost every single writer I know will be so happy with a Starbucks giftcard.

The most important thing you can do for writers and speakers you want to support is to pray for them. Light candles for me, have masses said for Anthony and anything else you can do. I will take all of the prayer anyone is willing to offer up for me.

Thank you all for always having my back. I would have stopped writing a long time ago if it were not for you guys. Especially those of you who have been following my blog since Ramblings of a Crazy Face.


The Internet is on Fire

picture from Pixabay

Or at least I want to set it on fire every time I log into any of my social media accounts. Even Instagram which really pisses me off because I really thought the social contract of being on Instagram was solid as in I we all agreed that no politics would go on there. But this week it all went to shit.

Here’s my thing: I do not have it in me to argue with strangers online anymore. I spent a lot of time doing that before Anthony died and it got me nowhere except regretting it when I buried him. I do not think anyone wins an argument on morality and politics on social media. In fact, I have lost a lot of friends because of my political freak outs. It is not that they did not agree with me, although I would say that most did not agree with me, but it was that I was hysterical. Nobody will ever listen to the arguments of a person calling them a moron. This is hard for me, especially when it comes to politics. Because I am a bit of an elitist and a Platonist. Plato was known to say that not everyone was smart enough to vote. I tend to agree with him because I am a horrible person. Which is why seething about political issues online does nothing to help me bring anyone to know Jesus and actually is probably a good way for me to walk my ass right into the pit of hell.

So! I have been staying out of the dumpster fire that is the internet. What have I been doing you ask? Well, get this! I have been doing my homework. GASP And I read a book, watched a movie and an entire series on Amazon Prime. But because I am not on social media to tell anyone and my husband is still in the desert, I haven’t talked to anyone about any of these things! Which is why I’m here on my blog because I also need to write and without Facebook, I came back to write about them on the blog.

1. The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel – I had been avoiding watching this show even though a lot of people told me it was great. I don’t know why I avoided it really, just that I did and that was a mistake. I watched the first episode and was hooked. This show is so cute and funny. The main character’s outfits are beautiful. It is about women’s creativity and the high cost of it sometimes. Also, the family is a real family who has issues and heartache but sticks together. I normally would not watch a show about someone who is from the upper class because I do not relate to that kind of life at all, but this show really hit home how we all have so much in common in the human experience. I love it and can’t wait to see the next season!

2. I read a whole book. Maid by Stephanie Land. Stephanie is a great writer and really does such an amazing job of capturing what life is like when you are trying to make ends meet with a shitty job as a single mother. I have been there. What this book taught me is that I am so lucky. While I do not think that it’s lucky that I come from generations of poor people, I am lucky that I never wondered how to get on foodstamps or get medicaid when I was pregnant. I always knew what milk qualified for WIC and I never had anyone be rude to me at the grocery store for using foodstamps. Because when you live among other poor people, everyone gets it. But the struggle of working when you have a sick kid or finding daycare that is safe is one that I know well. Crawling out of poverty and having one tiny thing kick you right back in is part of the life of being poor too. But the love that mothers have for their children is what fuels us to keep going and keep trying. Land writes about that love honestly and with amazing talent.

3. Wine Country on Netflix – It is just funny. Do not watch it and then come to me telling me that it’s inappropriate. Because I know, that is why it is funny.

4. Game of Thrones – I am not linking this. Ya’ll know where to find it. I am also not going to debate people about the morality of watching it. There is a reason that I am not on social media and that is because I do not want to argue with anyone. Part of that inspiration came from last Sunday’s episode of GOT. SPOILER ALERT. Stop reading if you do not want to read spoilers.

So in that episode Daenerys burnt down the entire city with her dragon because she was sick with grief and rage. Ummmm…. Where do I even begin. First of all, since I started watching this show I have asked for a dragon and God keeps silent. Literally, I ask God the creator of the Universe why I can’t have a dragon. I took His silence as a way of Him saying that I am crazy and He refuses to entertain me. But then as I watched that dragon burn everything to the ground I realized that I do have a dragon. My anger. And when I lost Anthony, I let it burn everything to the ground. I did not care who was in the path of destruction, it all burned. My relationships, my marriage, my friendships, my life, my writing, my faith.. all of it. And watching that episode made me reevaluate my life which meant getting of the internet for a bit.

So there you go, that is what I have been doing. If things keep up this way, I will end up actually going to the gym this next week. Ha!